Daily Harvest joins my thirty-five-year weight-loss struggle.

I’m sort of excited, but honestly? At this point I’m more resigned to failure. I’m going to die of a weight-related disease. I don’t seem to be able to reverse the trend. I turned 50 in November, and I think I’ll always be overweight.

But I’m still fighting. This year I started going to the gym, and actually lost about ten pounds from treadmill-walking for an hour and a half a week. Then I injured my knee, and haven’t yet recovered. I gained back all the weight, and then some. Of course. Because that’s how it always happens.

And now, it’s the middle of gloomy February, with my Seasonal Affective Disorder in free fall. All I want to do is hunker down with a book and a candle, and eat carbs. Cooking seems like a task for other people — the ones who don’t spend an hour and a half on the road each day, the ones who live where the sun shines, and who can stand on their feet for 45 minutes without their knees protesting. You know, all those people who eat kale.

My jealousy is clearly talking. And I’m upset that I’ve eaten more fast food in a month than I have all year.

But, remember, I’m still fighting. So I threw a crazy-stupid amount of money at Daily Harvest, as a Valentine’s Day gift to myself.

I chose Daily Harvest because they promise healthy, plant-based meals I can prepare quickly. I also liked the selection — smoothies, Harvest Bows (dinner/lunch-ish), Oat and Chia Bowls, Bites (fat bomb-ish concoctions), Soups, and Lattes. Smoothies twice a day would be fairly tedious, but I can totally do a smoothie and a bowl.

I also subscribed because their design aesthetic is pretty awesome. Honestly, those photos of the ingredients in bowls are genuis.

So far DH is kinda working? Maybe?

On the 14th I had a Peach + Strawberry Smoothie, a grocery store snack pack for lunch, and the Quinoa + Chipotle Harvest Bowl for dinner.

The smoothie? Meh. Their best-selling Peach + Strawberry Smoothie only had 3 grams of protein. It picked up a little more protein from the almond milk, but it’s not close to the two-egg and bacon breakfast I usually have. Worse, the smoothie tasted like it was 90% banana. No peach flavor at all. I’m not a banana fan, so the smoothie lost major points with that misstep. The texture was also too watery for my taste, even with the banana. Admittedly, though, my smoothies are usually the ultra-creamy kind with Greek yogurt or cottage cheese. Most people will probably be fine with the texture.

The Quinoa + Chipotle Harvest Bowl, on the other hand, rocks. As promised, it only took a few minutes to heat up. I threw in rotisserie chicken for protein, and used Back to Nature Fiesta Black Bean Crackers to help shovel the veggies onto my fork. I really enjoyed the mix of quinoa, zucchini, tomatoes, corn, onions, bell pepper, chipotle, and (gasp) kale. That’s right — I ate kale, and I’d eat it again. The heat from the chipotle balanced the veggies perfectly. I’ve ordered more of this bowl, and want to keep it in the freezer as a standby.

Weekends are always dangerous. I get bored, and eat. And read. And eat. And read some more. Then I take a nap. And eat again.

So, Saturday the 15th was really an exercise in resistance. I wasn’t 100% successful. The only DH bowl I ate was the Tart Cherry + Raspberry Smoothie. I used almond milk again. While this smoothie tasted better, I still wasn’t in love with it. After drinking half I added a squirt of sugar-free vanilla syrup. That helped. No bowls that evening; we went out to dinner.

Today, the 16th, I reached Smoothie Nirvana while drinking the Daily Harvest Cherry + Almond Smoothie. I switched up the liquid, going with my favorite Oikos plain Greek yogurt and water. This made the smoothie creamier, and added more protein. I also added about two teaspoons of sugar-free syrup to offset the unflavored yogurt’s tang.

For dinner I went with the Avocado + Beet Poke Bowl. Once again, worried about the protein content (I get headaches if I skimp on protein), I added an Everything Bagel codfish fillet from the frozen food aisle at Sam’s Wholesale. The dish wasn’t horrible, but also wasn’t interesting. I tried spreading it on sourdough, thanks to a YouTube video I found. Nope. Then I smeared Boursin cheese on the bread. Still nope. I threw about half of it into the sink.