I am giving myself permission to fail today. It’s OK.  Really.

My apartment is really drafty and cold.  I sleep right beside the window, and no matter how much I run the heat I’m freezing due to the awful draft. WIndow film kits help, but the three big windows have window sills, and I can’t get the film to stick properly around the sill no matter what I do.  There is probably a trick somewhere, but I haven’t been able to Google it.

So last weekend I tried to make these cool-sounding removable interior storm windows. This was supposed to be a fairly cost-effective project, but I didn’t stop to think that the costs listed on the website didn’t include tools, like a miter box or a saw.  They also didn’t include stain for the wood, wood conditioner, a drop cloth, or a paintbrush.  The project also would force me to remove the mini-blinds in my windows, which means I suddenly needed curtains for three rooms plus window hardware.

My cost so far? $220.30.  Yeah, ouch is right. I might as well run my heat at 80 degrees for what this is costing me. And so far I only have curtains for one window, and I need more lumber and another window film kit. Did I mention I’ve screwed up construction, too?

First of all, the pine I purchased was about twice what it should cost since it’s “premium,” but it was the only wood in the correct size so I didn’t have much choice. I couldn’t find anyone in the store to cut the wood for me, so after a phone consult with my sister I purchased a miter box and a saw, wrongly believing I could cut the wood myself. Once I toted everything into the house I realized the 8 foot pine I thought I had bought was only 6 foot, which is good because I could barely fit the 6 foot into my car, but bad because now I’m short wood. And it was cold last weekend, like 40-something degrees, so i tried doing everything indoors, including staining the wood with whitewash.

I’ve been spoiled all my life by a father with serious power tools. In the old days I’d drive over to his house and with the help of his bandsaw would have cut all the wood in about half an hour. But I don’t have that luxury any longer, and the circular saw I could rent scares me. I resorted to using the saw and the miter box atop a flimsy card table, which didn’t work too well.  After twenty minutes of fighting the saw, I managed to cut a piece of wood about three inches too long, so I had to cut it again. (Yes, I measured.  Twice.  Not sure what happened.) I moved to a sturdier surface, but sawing still took for freaking ever, and I’ve gouged my sturdier surface in the process. (An Ikea Expedit bookcase on its side.) The saw doesn’t like me. It only wants to saw one way. And all this crap online about “let the saw do the work?” No one says what to do if the saw doesn’t want to work.

Did I mention I’m allergic to pine? Pine furniture isn’t bad, but the dust makes my hands swell. About a decade ago I accidentally touched pine sap, and my hand went numb in a matter of minutes. This is almost as bad. And I’m still in the house, because hello, cold, so the dust is everywhere. I thought I could handle it for a day, but two weekends is a little much.

After my third cut I gave up temporarily. Just for last weekend.  But this weekend, after reassessing my options and lack of capital, I decided to throw in the towel. I could rent a reciprocating saw, but I’d still have to buy more wood and curtains, a window kit, and window hardware.  Say another $150. It’s not worth it. I need to quit throwing good money after bad and admit this isn’t going to happen. I’ve failed interior storm windows.